Crystal Clear

I left things with David pretty clear: I wasn’t interested in dating him, we were too different and that I wanted to be his friend. Then he flipped his shit.

And by flipped his shit, I mean he left an insulting remark on my facebook wall and DEFRIEND ME on facebook. Seriously. What IS it about me running into men who can’t have a fucking conversation without taking their toys and running home?

So, my attitude was a general, “Damn. Nice to know ya, ya unbalanced retard.”

He was fearful of what I was going to write about him — thinking that since I didn’t want to date him, surely that would mean that I would outline all sorts of personal details you know, in detail, about his private business.

I get it, okay? As a blogger with a blog that people actually read, I understand the powah that I possess here. But am I really such a fucking evildoer that if I don’t get my way, people expect me to roast them over the coals and expose all their inner most secrets?

Fuck that. With great power comes great responsibility.

The experiences that I have with a person are bound to get recorded in some way — I’m a fucking writer. And even though you have experienced these same experiences with me, they don’t belong to you. You can’t pressure me to not write about what has happened to ME.

But we talked and he apologized. I told him that his behavior was stupid and immature and passive aggressive and he agreed. We agreed to be friends and continue moving forward in a friendly fashion and he left the ball in my court as to how I would like to proceed romantically in the future, stating again that he wanted to pursue things with me. I felt uncomfortable with that, seeing as how I was confident that I didn’t want to date him, but I did want to be his friend and, at one point, I really did want to date him so maybe leaving the door open would be a good plan and I also I figured boundaries would start to define themselves over time.

It’s been four or five days since I heard from him (via text after I had already gone to bed) and you know, I’ve been busy trying to get myself healthy and working and two different doctor’s appointments for my son to deal with his ADHD. But I just figured, whatever. I replied to his text and shrugged, “I’ll talk to him when I talk to him.”

So why am I writing about all of this now? Because David thought it would funny to put this as his status (I’m paraphrasing here), “I will never online date a girl with a hateful blog with 200,000 viewers again. I will never online date a girl with a hateful blog with 200,000 viewers again.I will never online date a girl with a hateful blog with 200,000 viewers again.I will never online date a girl with a hateful blog with 200,000 viewers again.” Clearly, this was directed at me but CLEARLY, David has yet to find his spine and have a fucking conversation about shit and would rather resort to passive aggressive, immature behavior.

So I unloaded. Told him I wasn’t interested in being his friend, that I wasn’t interested in dating him, that I felt like he was the most passive aggressive person I’ve ever met and I tossed in a couple “fuck you”s for good measure. His response was pretty much exactly what I expected out of him: deflection paired with more passive aggressive behavior.

Apparently, David still felt like things were unclear. When he read the post yesterday about being the Queen of Infatuation, he said, “Incidentally, letting me know ON YOUR BLOG that we’re through isn’t the most straight-shooter tactic, either.” But seriously, there was nothing in the post that wasn’t true. I HAD become quite infatuated with David pretty quickly and, just as quickly, out of it. I had been pretty clear in my post about that, too.

Daft. Dense. I was pretty certain I was clear that I didn’t want to date him — you know, because I used words like, “I don’t want to date you.”

So let me be clear: if you are spineless or timid or insecure or shy or unaware of how to interact and communicate in general social situations — I do not want to date you. I’m not a wall-flower and I’m not a push-over. If you plan to pursue me and date me, you should know that I will write about most things. If it makes you uncomfortable, you should make peace with it now because I will never promise a man that I won’t write about my experiences with him. Will I conduct myself in a manner that is respectful and mature even when situations reveal themselves in my writing? You bet your sorry ass.

Is that clear enough, David? Since you refuse to actually have a conversation with me about how you’re feeling and you’d rather just read the blog to get a gauge on how I’m feeling and then react in a tantrum-toddler fashion, I figured this post would help you understand things a bit.

And to the rest of the men in the universe: don’t step up to this plate unless you’re CONFIDENT that you’re a man.

Get Yer Share On, Fool

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